Boogers Versus Burps

There are two things that give me great satisfaction when caring for the girls. One is getting a nice, juicy, booger from their nose. The other is getting a monster burp out of them. Now I'm not talking about a little weenie burp, but one of those giant ones. Like if you didn't see the little baby beast it came out of, you'd think it was a fat trucker dude that just downed a can of beer. These burps shake the ground you walk on.

So what is more satisfying? I'll let you decide!

My Case for Boogers
Boogers aren't a daily or even weekly occurrence, but when one of the girls has some cloggage in their nose. It is up to me to dig it out. Sometimes you need a little saline, sometimes you just need some real patience. You also need the right tools. Some of those bulb things are useless...I mean the tips of them are bigger than the girls nostril! Your pinky fingernail is also a great tool. Anyway, you really need to get the right suction, the right angle, and if still doesn't come out you need the right length of fingernail to finally dig it out. These girls' boogers are giant, slimey and long. No wonder they have trouble breathing! Sometimes I feel like it is a magic trick where you think the booger ends, but it just keeps coming out of their nose.

My Case for Monster Burps
The monster burp has already been described above. Just imagine patting a little 12 pound baby on the back and all of a sudden you are deafened by a sonic boom. Yeah they burp at every feeding, but when you got the real whopper...you just step back and say how the heck did she burp that loud? It is really amazing. It's even better when they don't barf all over you after the burp.

I need to find a job and stop writing on this blog...